reality to the right - wonderland to the left

It's saturday night and I'm sitting at home, listening to music and working on my computer.
what comes to my mind is the change that is about to take place in my life in the coming week. But also the fact that I will miss my family and friends and face the challenge to make new friends.
Yes I do believe it is a challenge - to make new friends. why I'm not sure... maybe because I dont have all that confidence I should have?

It's strange.. I planned to go up north this weekend, party with friends and see some friends play for the first time in a band on a stage.
But reality sank in, I have too many things to organize, plan and pack before I leave this lovely country of mine.
I realized that, even though I'm fairly organized individual, I'm very unorganized and my prioritation could be questioned. But I always see it in the end - let's hope I always manage before it's too late!

Reality.. what an interesting word.
What is my reality? Where does the reality end and my dream/hopes begin?
Reality is easy to change but I think people ( including me ) dont realize how to.
for those who believe in the "secret" reality is what they dream of - it becomes true!
That's great.
As I listen to Aerosmith with the song "walk this way" I start thinking about the paths that I have been walking and the reality they belonged to.
So I'm just gonna walk this way - that I'm on now - and when the time comes, I will change my reality according to what I want, where I'm heading and how I see would be the best for me!
It's that easy ;)

Well, I'm off to sleep
-with love-

happy as a hippo?

as I have mentioned here before - even though I dont blog things are still running crazy around in my head. This is no exeption!

In just few days a new chapter in my life will start and I'm getting so excited about it. It's a chapter I chose for myself with a lot of thinking and soulsearching.
And It's almost here.

A new chapter which includes both a new challenge in educaion as well to move and adapt to a new country, new environment, new culture.
I'm ready.

I had a very interesing talks with two friends, Lyuba and Hildur, the other day.
We meet to talk about how to find the paths we want to take in life, choices and action steps towards personal development.
I realized I have many ways to work, may good and some not so good. I like sharing my experience and find out options for friends to gain a valuable experiences, finding themselves and be happy - whatever happiness means to them!

What is happiness?
I believe 2 people have exactly the same deffinition on what happiness is for them.
and maybe due to that people question the fact they will ever find happiness.
My opinion is this,
You have to understand who you are and what makes you happy, what is happiness to you!
Without this basic understanding of you, you are running wildly tryig to catch something that might not even be valuable for you.
But I dont think people realize that happiness can be different from one person to the next.

I am one step closer to fully understand what happiness is to me.
At this point in life I am as happy as I can be, with he understanding that I have of myself.

-with love-

a choice a way from experience

as July has come to an end and my favorite month starts with pouring rain and freezing cold I feel satisfied.
July was a hell of a month with hard work, meeting friends and being extremely proud of the summer course I was cooperating on.

In a hard time like Iceland is facing these days, to be supporting 20 new entrepreneurial companies to start business is an amazing feeling. It's kind a hard to explain.. you just have to experience it your self..
the feeling of joy, of success, of gratitude to those who also made this happen and to participants who managed to make this experience come to life.

Now, as I sit at my cousins place up west, I start to think about all the action steps that have led me to where I am today.
it's all about choices and not being afraid to take them.
You never know if they are the right ones for you at the time.. but with every choice and decision you are at least one step closer to another experience.
If you are too afraid - you just stay at same place and dont develop.
that's my experience

So from january this year I have been trying to take smart decisions that lead me to where I want to be.. and so far I have managed to come safe and stronger from each choice I have made.

Choices are so important and to tell people about your choice builds a commitment towards it.
Then you are more likely to stay true to the choice and where it leads you.
Personally I know, there are some choices I have to make - for myself - but I dont speak about them to others so there is no commitment building on my part!
I know this about myself, I know the choices and the decision I have to make but I just dont want to!
What is that all about?

Well.. first step I guess is to realize I have to make a choice.
Then to make it
Then to stick by it ( that's the hardest part sometimes )
then to enjoy the good things that come from this decision!

Hopefully I manage soon!

- with love -

building a dream on sand!

How easy is it to create a feeling? or rekindle a feeling you thought had left your life?
I know I'm a very sensitive person who feels a lot, but for example love - doesn't come easy to me.
I fall easily but the fall is always short and fades away soon!
But the feeling comes quickly - it doesn't take a lot
Why?

Maybe it's just because I know how it feels to be in love and it's a feeling I wouldn't mind feeling again. So I'm trying to slowly but steadily to get there?
oh man.. just a random thinking I know but it is something that I have been thinking about as I have noticed this with me.

Maybe it's because I like this tingling feeling of liking someone.
but why does it come so fast and fade a way even faster?
Who knows.. certainly not me :p

Even though the tingling feeling is nice, I sometimes dream to much and build ideas on sand... then when it rains my dream is shattered.. and I'm left without a tingling and have to start all over again.
So I ask again.. why am I creating feelings that most likely are built on sand?
What encourages me?
What do I stand to gain? or loose?

I guess I have some more thinking to do!
-with love-

expanding my zones of comfort

I think people are afraid of stepping out of their comfort zone, trying things they have never done before and meet people they usually would not meet.
I experienced this yesterday when I decided to step out of my comfort zone and go to a metal concert with three Icelandic metal bands.
This was my first time, I was feeling a little nervous about not fitting in but I also had this excitement feeling in my stomach.
I wanted to try!

I dont think I have been so nervous about what to wear in years. Usually I dont care, but yesterday I was nervous. I had to get help from my sister-in-law.
But when I was sure of the outfit then all fell into place. I was feeling much much more secure.
It was just this first step towards something new that was scary..
When that was done I new I would just enjoy this experience with friends who by the way were also stepping outside their comfort zones.
There's power in support I have noticed!

By now I have gotten to know more people, new type of music and Icelandic band that is about to tour all over Europe but I had never even heard of them.
So I have to admit, taking this step yesterday and just go with the flow and not being to uptight - that has been paying off for me this summer.
I feel good about this.
Actually, I feel great!

I wish more people would do this, not being afraid.
Then I guess understanding, patience and potential cooperation would be easier amongst people!
Just a thought.

- with love -

Body and mind

Our bodies are very interesting "invention".
No matter how hard we work it without little or no rest it proves that it can take almost everything we bring..
But for a short period of time - I mean - without proper resting and relaxing.

This, I am feeling right now.
I have been working maybe a little to much without a day off and relaxing.
Today I felt the consequences.
I had fever, head ache and felt really bad.

Of course I started taking it more easy but it's hard when you are at work.;)
Did I listen to the body?
Neh, I knew I should have gone straight home after work, rest and maybe even take a bath.
But I decided to meet a friend.
Of course I do not regret that decision as i haven't met her in a long time.
But I also feel as I get home early that I needed it.

So now I'm starting to realize that if I want to be able to take Copenhagen head on I need to take it easy now.
Even though I am enjoying working so much.. I need to rest, relax and charge my batteries.
I will need them full when I go back to school.

Yes,
Your bodies and minds are amazing.
How much we can use them.
But I think we dont use them as much as we should - in a proper way at least ;)
Anyway..
I'm starting to talk crazy..
I'm going to sleep, resting my body as well as mind.

- with love -

what I make of life

I started to blog yesterday but I never got the time to finish it.
So let's just start again!
Today I finished a big working schedule - 13 days without a day off - and I managed. Although I can admit that this morning I was not really ready to wake up.
But I always enjoy going to work.

It's so strange but I feel like when I keep myself so busy I dont really have time to sit down and reflect on my thoughts, experiences and feelings.
Like when I was in Paris.
Then, I was feeling so much but with a lot of time to digest the feelings and thoughts that came with.
Now, my feelings have not faded but my time to sit down and analyze what they actually mean is less these days then I actually would like.

A sentence was said to me today at work - "work is what you make of it" and I do agree.
I think both work and life is what you make of it. And now, I want to be happy... So I am happy.
Even though I havent had many days off I still enjoy the work I'm doing, the people I work with and I know I will be able to use the salaries in a good way towards something that I really want - my studies!

So you can basically say, I'm grabbing life by it's head and making it be as I want it to be.. as beautiful as it can be... and stay as happy as I can be!
Positive attitude is the key, that I have really figured out!

- with love -