Life is full of questions - I dare to ask them and hope for answers.

Monday, July 27, 2009

building a dream on sand!

How easy is it to create a feeling? or rekindle a feeling you thought had left your life?
I know I'm a very sensitive person who feels a lot, but for example love - doesn't come easy to me.
I fall easily but the fall is always short and fades away soon!
But the feeling comes quickly - it doesn't take a lot
Why?

Maybe it's just because I know how it feels to be in love and it's a feeling I wouldn't mind feeling again. So I'm trying to slowly but steadily to get there?
oh man.. just a random thinking I know but it is something that I have been thinking about as I have noticed this with me.

Maybe it's because I like this tingling feeling of liking someone.
but why does it come so fast and fade a way even faster?
Who knows.. certainly not me :p

Even though the tingling feeling is nice, I sometimes dream to much and build ideas on sand... then when it rains my dream is shattered.. and I'm left without a tingling and have to start all over again.
So I ask again.. why am I creating feelings that most likely are built on sand?
What encourages me?
What do I stand to gain? or loose?

I guess I have some more thinking to do!
-with love-

Sunday, July 26, 2009

expanding my zones of comfort

I think people are afraid of stepping out of their comfort zone, trying things they have never done before and meet people they usually would not meet.
I experienced this yesterday when I decided to step out of my comfort zone and go to a metal concert with three Icelandic metal bands.
This was my first time, I was feeling a little nervous about not fitting in but I also had this excitement feeling in my stomach.
I wanted to try!

I dont think I have been so nervous about what to wear in years. Usually I dont care, but yesterday I was nervous. I had to get help from my sister-in-law.
But when I was sure of the outfit then all fell into place. I was feeling much much more secure.
It was just this first step towards something new that was scary..
When that was done I new I would just enjoy this experience with friends who by the way were also stepping outside their comfort zones.
There's power in support I have noticed!

By now I have gotten to know more people, new type of music and Icelandic band that is about to tour all over Europe but I had never even heard of them.
So I have to admit, taking this step yesterday and just go with the flow and not being to uptight - that has been paying off for me this summer.
I feel good about this.
Actually, I feel great!

I wish more people would do this, not being afraid.
Then I guess understanding, patience and potential cooperation would be easier amongst people!
Just a thought.

- with love -

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Body and mind

Our bodies are very interesting "invention".
No matter how hard we work it without little or no rest it proves that it can take almost everything we bring..
But for a short period of time - I mean - without proper resting and relaxing.

This, I am feeling right now.
I have been working maybe a little to much without a day off and relaxing.
Today I felt the consequences.
I had fever, head ache and felt really bad.

Of course I started taking it more easy but it's hard when you are at work.;)
Did I listen to the body?
Neh, I knew I should have gone straight home after work, rest and maybe even take a bath.
But I decided to meet a friend.
Of course I do not regret that decision as i haven't met her in a long time.
But I also feel as I get home early that I needed it.

So now I'm starting to realize that if I want to be able to take Copenhagen head on I need to take it easy now.
Even though I am enjoying working so much.. I need to rest, relax and charge my batteries.
I will need them full when I go back to school.

Yes,
Your bodies and minds are amazing.
How much we can use them.
But I think we dont use them as much as we should - in a proper way at least ;)
Anyway..
I'm starting to talk crazy..
I'm going to sleep, resting my body as well as mind.

- with love -

Thursday, July 16, 2009

what I make of life

I started to blog yesterday but I never got the time to finish it.
So let's just start again!
Today I finished a big working schedule - 13 days without a day off - and I managed. Although I can admit that this morning I was not really ready to wake up.
But I always enjoy going to work.

It's so strange but I feel like when I keep myself so busy I dont really have time to sit down and reflect on my thoughts, experiences and feelings.
Like when I was in Paris.
Then, I was feeling so much but with a lot of time to digest the feelings and thoughts that came with.
Now, my feelings have not faded but my time to sit down and analyze what they actually mean is less these days then I actually would like.

A sentence was said to me today at work - "work is what you make of it" and I do agree.
I think both work and life is what you make of it. And now, I want to be happy... So I am happy.
Even though I havent had many days off I still enjoy the work I'm doing, the people I work with and I know I will be able to use the salaries in a good way towards something that I really want - my studies!

So you can basically say, I'm grabbing life by it's head and making it be as I want it to be.. as beautiful as it can be... and stay as happy as I can be!
Positive attitude is the key, that I have really figured out!

- with love -

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Self awareness but no will power?

Time is flying so fast these days that I feel like I'm loosing balance. I can not finish everything I need. Or that's my feeling.
But even though this feeling is there I still enjoy my life, my work, my activities.

There is something extremely frustrating about myself that I can not seem to figure out a solution to.
I have so many ideas of what I want to do for my self and I know they are good for me, but I dont make them happen.
I keep thinking... I'll start on monday.
Then monday comes and I think.... man, I will start on wednesday or something.
And all the time when I'm procrastinating these action steps i should take, there is a tiny voice in my head saying.. Thordis, you lazy bastard.

Where do people find the strength, skills and will power to change their behavior from one way to a better but more challenging way?
And what is it that is making me so lazy to go the direction I know is good for me?
What to do when you know the destination but the journey there is still a mystery?
What then?

If you figure this out, please let me know.
I need to do something.
I know that.
But I just need to figure out how I get myself to do it!

- with love -

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Life sure is beautiful

A new month has arrived and life sure is beautiful.

I enjoy my work, I'm doing interesting things in my free time like snorkeling, Whale watching and spending time with friends and family.
And the best thing of all is that life sure is following my idea of where to go.
I got accepted to CBS for my master studies in Economics and business administration - with focus on Strategy, organization and leadership :)
And that makes me just so much more happier.

So as July starts with big bangs that are so many things that I need to start thinking of, plan, organize and do.
but somehow I can not seem to find the time.

Getting accepted to CBS is a milestone for me towards my goals in the future.
I was so scared that I wouldn't get accepted as there were so many people applying.
But I did.
Leaving to Denmark brings me closer to what I want to do in life, it's what I'm passionate about and I'm looking SO much forward to take on this challenge and also live in a different country.

I do feel blessed, I feel lucky and I feel happy these days!

Life sure is beautiful. :)
- with love -