Today I was looking at pictures from my little nephew's baptism and I got tears in my eyes.
I looked at my little brother holding his son while the priest was reading the rituals and I felt so proud and I know that my brother also felt so proud of this little creature that is now part of our family.
It was a moment I would have loved to share with my family but I was there in spirit and thoughts.
These past few days have been quite hard and made me do some thinking about what I am actually doing and how this will contribute to my future, if in anyway it does.
Challenges keep appear from nowhere and I have to tackle them in a best way I can. But why does this have to be so HARD?
There is all the time something bothering me when it comes to this role, the logistical side of it or financial side.
Where is the lesson I'm supposed to take from this experience?
I can not relate this to any of my future steps and that demotivates me.
I feel like i'm banging my head against the wall with no reason at all to do so.
Even though I can not see the learning I'm supposed to take from this - I do believe that there is learning in everything, I just have to look hard enough to find it and actually learn from it.
So these next few days will be on that. Where am I headed where this experience, this learning, this patience will be required?
So I keep fighting this lost cost ( if it is so ) and make sure I'm enjoying as much as I can.
- with love -