Today is the last day of the year 2012, a year that was full of smiles, love and laughter, tears, frustrations and irritations. But what stands out from all the events of the year, my interactions with people and the learning i take from the year, is my confirmation of a strong family and friends, my ability to love again and my path re-established. That is the most important things that happen for me this year, and that is amazing.
As the new year enters, I am confident it will be full of love, excitement, and joyful events as well as challenging aspects and hard times. Then it comes handy to have a strong family and a supportive boyfriend.
I do not want to spend too much time writing here, I want to head on out and spend time with my family and celebrate with them this new year and honor those who have left us and love those who are with us.
I wish for everyone, a year full of love and joy, and success in the path that you have chosen!
I wish you cherish your family, stay loyal to your friends and they stay loyal to you.
I wish you to have courage to follow through with your dreams, hopes and love.
I wish you to reach your goals and your aspirations.
I wish for challenges you will overcome, alone or with help of friends and/or family.
I wish this as well for me, as I enter the new year full of unexpected adventures.
I know I will make the most of them with love, honesty and hard work.
Bring it on!!
-with love-
Monday, December 31, 2012
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Interpretations of love
Why is it that when women (yes I know I'm generalizing) are in love they also become overly interpretive? Why do we become so insecure? Why do we doubt everything and everyone good in our life?
I keep wondering about this as I feel i'm trying to interpret every little thing, and in a more of a negative way than in a good way.
Every small remark, action, lack of action becomes a little note in my head, and I over analyse it to "understand" what he actually meant by this.
Why do I do that?
I believe its good to understand behaviors of your significant other, but when it becomes such an over analysis and negative interpretations it is nothing more than a hinder to the relationship.
And I know that.. but I cannot stop interpreting and doubting. That only leaves me hurting because he does not mean the things I've created in my mind, with his actions.
I wish I could just stop interpret and over analyse.
It is not so simple, because my "research" has shown that I am not the only woman in a relationship that does these things. So maybe it is a female thing..
but then, how can we overcome it and make sure we enjoy the love and the relationship we are in?
just a question, would love to have an answer to it but I doubt I will.
- with love -
I keep wondering about this as I feel i'm trying to interpret every little thing, and in a more of a negative way than in a good way.
Every small remark, action, lack of action becomes a little note in my head, and I over analyse it to "understand" what he actually meant by this.
Why do I do that?
I believe its good to understand behaviors of your significant other, but when it becomes such an over analysis and negative interpretations it is nothing more than a hinder to the relationship.
And I know that.. but I cannot stop interpreting and doubting. That only leaves me hurting because he does not mean the things I've created in my mind, with his actions.
I wish I could just stop interpret and over analyse.
It is not so simple, because my "research" has shown that I am not the only woman in a relationship that does these things. So maybe it is a female thing..
but then, how can we overcome it and make sure we enjoy the love and the relationship we are in?
just a question, would love to have an answer to it but I doubt I will.
- with love -
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
I feel like snow... my romance in life!
It is amazing how much the weather affects our emotions. When its raining and dark outside, we are more likely to be in a sadder mood, feeling blue and heavy and even close to depression. And when the sun is shining our spirit lifts up and we enjoy life.
But I have noticed that my emotions also "affect" the weather. What do I mean by this?
I mean, when I am sad, no matter how the weather is, it feels dark and cold. The snow falling is uncomfortable and bothering, its freezing outside and so on. But when I'm happy, life becomes so much better. even if it is dark outside.. I try to look up and see the stars. When its snowing I feel it is romantic and rain is peaceful.
So I mean what I say, its not only the weather that affects our emotions. Our emotions are strong enough to affect our interpretation of the weather, and how we tackle each day at a time.
Why did I want to write this?
Well, I dont think we are aware of our own power to make life hard or lively. Being aware how your emotions color the world you live in, is important as you might try to balance emotions, limit the drama around you and stay focused and optimistic as much as you can.
Then the hardness in life is likelier to become less hard, could be romantic even. If we just allow it to be so.
That was just my message this time.
Be aware of your feelings and how they affect your day, your relationship with others and the weather ;)
-with love-
But I have noticed that my emotions also "affect" the weather. What do I mean by this?
I mean, when I am sad, no matter how the weather is, it feels dark and cold. The snow falling is uncomfortable and bothering, its freezing outside and so on. But when I'm happy, life becomes so much better. even if it is dark outside.. I try to look up and see the stars. When its snowing I feel it is romantic and rain is peaceful.
So I mean what I say, its not only the weather that affects our emotions. Our emotions are strong enough to affect our interpretation of the weather, and how we tackle each day at a time.
Why did I want to write this?
Well, I dont think we are aware of our own power to make life hard or lively. Being aware how your emotions color the world you live in, is important as you might try to balance emotions, limit the drama around you and stay focused and optimistic as much as you can.
Then the hardness in life is likelier to become less hard, could be romantic even. If we just allow it to be so.
That was just my message this time.
Be aware of your feelings and how they affect your day, your relationship with others and the weather ;)
-with love-
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Birds of feather flock together? is that healthy?
I've started to think a lot about differences in opinion, when too much difference starts affecting relationships (or does it at all) and are opinions build on valuable foundations or not so much (if I can say so).
I know a person who has political opinions and views that are so far from my own, but I enjoy listening to his point of view, discussing issues with him and challenging his views based on my own opinions. But I have been thinking a lot lately about the future and how our opinions and political views can impact our relationship, will it be a challenge? Because the people we associate the most with are the people with similar worldviews as you do, right? Will they be as open minded as I am to discuss and argue and listen and acknowledge?
I want to believe so. But i think it is an interesting thought.
I do not know a lot of couples who have total opposite political views.
I do not know a lot of best friends who do not agree on issues.
of course, no one has exactly the same ideas and views (if so, that it is not their own in my opinion). But I still think people flock to like-minded people.
Or am I wrong?
I dont know any politicians who married someone from the opposition, not here in the western world, or in other country (fair enough I havent done an extensive research).
But if we only associate with those who are similar to ourselves, with similar views and believes, will we ever learn, will we ever challenge our thoughts only to make them stronger or find new paths to believe in?
And isnt that a challenge for our world?
Does that not just lead to impatience and intolerance ?
I dont know.. but that is my opinion.
I would like to hear yours!
- with love -
I know a person who has political opinions and views that are so far from my own, but I enjoy listening to his point of view, discussing issues with him and challenging his views based on my own opinions. But I have been thinking a lot lately about the future and how our opinions and political views can impact our relationship, will it be a challenge? Because the people we associate the most with are the people with similar worldviews as you do, right? Will they be as open minded as I am to discuss and argue and listen and acknowledge?
I want to believe so. But i think it is an interesting thought.
I do not know a lot of couples who have total opposite political views.
I do not know a lot of best friends who do not agree on issues.
of course, no one has exactly the same ideas and views (if so, that it is not their own in my opinion). But I still think people flock to like-minded people.
Or am I wrong?
I dont know any politicians who married someone from the opposition, not here in the western world, or in other country (fair enough I havent done an extensive research).
But if we only associate with those who are similar to ourselves, with similar views and believes, will we ever learn, will we ever challenge our thoughts only to make them stronger or find new paths to believe in?
And isnt that a challenge for our world?
Does that not just lead to impatience and intolerance ?
I dont know.. but that is my opinion.
I would like to hear yours!
- with love -
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
how is my life?
How is a life
that one moment spreads joy
and the next is covered in tears?
How is a life
where pain is to be
in love with the one?
How is a life
where the one you love
is there and not there?
How sad is my life,
when the day of joy
becomes overly sad?
How sad is my life
when tears decide my time
and I cry in the night?
How is a life
where you hope for the best
when sadness takes over?
that is a life I am willing to live!
that one moment spreads joy
and the next is covered in tears?
How is a life
where pain is to be
in love with the one?
How is a life
where the one you love
is there and not there?
How sad is my life,
when the day of joy
becomes overly sad?
How sad is my life
when tears decide my time
and I cry in the night?
How is a life
where you hope for the best
when sadness takes over?
that is a life I am willing to live!
Sunday, October 21, 2012
life is full of beauty - we just have to be open for it!
During hard times, one has to hope that brighter time is on its way... because if we keep focusing too much on the hard time in our life, we lose spirit and passion for life.
I know this first hand.
Not an experience I want to dwell on but it leads me to another thought I had today...
Beauty of life. Can that only be visible after you see things in black and gray? why do we always wait with appreciate life until it becomes extremely hard?
Today I was walking around this beautiful garden, leaves were falling, the colors were amazing and I was there with loved one.
for a moment I stopped and I just looked around me. How can I think of negative things in this environment?
How blessed am I to live in this place, to be able to enjoy and appreciate the seasonal changes and share this with the man I love?
And that made me realize that I dont do this enough.
Just look around, counting my blessings (because they are more than the negative things) and just love my life and the people in it.
Of course, this doesnt make the challenges go away.
but maybe, just maybe, by appreciating the beauty around us, the people that make life special and the moments that actually mean the most.. the challenges will not be so unbearable.
I think so.
I actually can feel it.. as I am looking forward to tackle the challenges of the coming week.
I hope you feel the same after stopping and just letting go.. breath in the beauty your life has to offer (it is there somewhere, I guaranty you that).
I hope life's challenges will become just a speed bump you will easily overcome.
that I wish for.
-With love-
I know this first hand.
Not an experience I want to dwell on but it leads me to another thought I had today...
Beauty of life. Can that only be visible after you see things in black and gray? why do we always wait with appreciate life until it becomes extremely hard?
Today I was walking around this beautiful garden, leaves were falling, the colors were amazing and I was there with loved one.
for a moment I stopped and I just looked around me. How can I think of negative things in this environment?
How blessed am I to live in this place, to be able to enjoy and appreciate the seasonal changes and share this with the man I love?
And that made me realize that I dont do this enough.
Just look around, counting my blessings (because they are more than the negative things) and just love my life and the people in it.
Of course, this doesnt make the challenges go away.
but maybe, just maybe, by appreciating the beauty around us, the people that make life special and the moments that actually mean the most.. the challenges will not be so unbearable.
I think so.
I actually can feel it.. as I am looking forward to tackle the challenges of the coming week.
I hope you feel the same after stopping and just letting go.. breath in the beauty your life has to offer (it is there somewhere, I guaranty you that).
I hope life's challenges will become just a speed bump you will easily overcome.
that I wish for.
-With love-
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Be strong enough to be your girl!
It is amazing feeling when you are in love, when you found that special someone you want to share your life, your love, your strength and weaknesses, your happiness and sorrow. basically your everything. It doesnt happen easily for most people, because finding someone means you have to show vulnerability and emotions.. two things people are scared to show. And I get it.. I am the same. I make sure I hide my feelings but sometimes that is just so hard.
So when you find someone you are willing (and able) to share your life with it becomes so hard when you cannot help them. some situations you are not strong enough, or have the capabilities to help them and that is one of the worst feelings in the world.
But what can one do in those situations?
because you feel so helpless, your partner is hurting or in tough situations, and there is nothing you can do. Things are not in your reach to help.
How do you make sure you are strong enough to just be there?
just be there for the one you love in their situation?
and what does it mean, to be strong?
I want to be strong.
I want to understand what it means to be strong.
and how to get to that strength.
Because I want to be there for the people in my life, my loved ones.
Because they are there for me when I need them.
and it's extremely important to me.
I want to make sure they feel the same!
- with love -
So when you find someone you are willing (and able) to share your life with it becomes so hard when you cannot help them. some situations you are not strong enough, or have the capabilities to help them and that is one of the worst feelings in the world.
But what can one do in those situations?
because you feel so helpless, your partner is hurting or in tough situations, and there is nothing you can do. Things are not in your reach to help.
How do you make sure you are strong enough to just be there?
just be there for the one you love in their situation?
and what does it mean, to be strong?
I want to be strong.
I want to understand what it means to be strong.
and how to get to that strength.
Because I want to be there for the people in my life, my loved ones.
Because they are there for me when I need them.
and it's extremely important to me.
I want to make sure they feel the same!
- with love -
Thursday, September 27, 2012
who are you and what do you want?
Despite the absence of writing my mind has been generating a lot of interesting thoughts. I just havent had the motivation to write them down or share with people. When life gets hard, it is like I close off. I need to bounce back.
And motivation is coming back, with support from loved ones. Life is becoming slowly more optimistic and good things are happening again. After a LONG summer full of challenges where I couldnt see the way out of.
I have said so many times "life is what you make of it" and of course it is true. But the thing is, you are not alone in this life (thankfully). You have to interact with other people on your quest to get the best life possible. And sometimes its the other people who stand in your way, who are the challenge in your life. and it is not so easy to work around other people.
Slowly the situation involving the "troublemakers" changes, sometimes to the better, sometimes to the worse. thankfully in my case it changed to the better. I of course did what I could do to solve the situation, but the other party has actions as well. And sometimes those actions lead you in even more challenges that you were in before.
Life is not so simple as you can do whatever you want and get whatever you want because there is always the interaction to the other person involved. of course, if you dont do what you have to to reach your dreams you will not become any closer to it. However, it would be naive to think that it comes without any obstacles or interactions with others. And maybe the other party wants what you want and will not allow you to get it. Maybe they screw you over, obstruct you in your quest by their actions (sometimes unintentionally). But you always have to account for interactions of others and how you want to counteract.
This is what I have been dealing with this summer. People unintentionally screwing me over, which leaves me in a mess. But I still decided to counteract with open minded, good communication and optimism, (dont get me wrong. I made sure I knew my rights and got what they owed me, just by being diplomatic). But despite that I want to work things out and do what I can to do so, the other party's action (or lack of) will affect the outcome of my work.
So my final point is this.. do what you have to do..but be aware that we are not alone in this. There are other people in the process you have to work with or communicate with that might disturb your work. So always have all details in place, keep facts clear, and think of all outcomes possible. By doing so, you will not be so surprised by the results and more able to counteract in the best way possible for you to reach what you want to reach.
human encounters are inevitable. We just have to be able to build the relationship in the way it is not a hinder to success but a support to it. You have to know how you are dealing with (as much as you can know someone) and by doing so you are more able to estimate reactions and build the right counter strategy if needed.
So let us not be surprised by people who might want our success but let us be prepared and overcome their selfishness and still reach our goals and dreams!
p.s not everyone is out to hurt us.. we have to find those who are friendly and build strong relationships with these people because we might need their support in dealing with those who do hurt us.
-with love-
And motivation is coming back, with support from loved ones. Life is becoming slowly more optimistic and good things are happening again. After a LONG summer full of challenges where I couldnt see the way out of.
I have said so many times "life is what you make of it" and of course it is true. But the thing is, you are not alone in this life (thankfully). You have to interact with other people on your quest to get the best life possible. And sometimes its the other people who stand in your way, who are the challenge in your life. and it is not so easy to work around other people.
Slowly the situation involving the "troublemakers" changes, sometimes to the better, sometimes to the worse. thankfully in my case it changed to the better. I of course did what I could do to solve the situation, but the other party has actions as well. And sometimes those actions lead you in even more challenges that you were in before.
Life is not so simple as you can do whatever you want and get whatever you want because there is always the interaction to the other person involved. of course, if you dont do what you have to to reach your dreams you will not become any closer to it. However, it would be naive to think that it comes without any obstacles or interactions with others. And maybe the other party wants what you want and will not allow you to get it. Maybe they screw you over, obstruct you in your quest by their actions (sometimes unintentionally). But you always have to account for interactions of others and how you want to counteract.
This is what I have been dealing with this summer. People unintentionally screwing me over, which leaves me in a mess. But I still decided to counteract with open minded, good communication and optimism, (dont get me wrong. I made sure I knew my rights and got what they owed me, just by being diplomatic). But despite that I want to work things out and do what I can to do so, the other party's action (or lack of) will affect the outcome of my work.
So my final point is this.. do what you have to do..but be aware that we are not alone in this. There are other people in the process you have to work with or communicate with that might disturb your work. So always have all details in place, keep facts clear, and think of all outcomes possible. By doing so, you will not be so surprised by the results and more able to counteract in the best way possible for you to reach what you want to reach.
human encounters are inevitable. We just have to be able to build the relationship in the way it is not a hinder to success but a support to it. You have to know how you are dealing with (as much as you can know someone) and by doing so you are more able to estimate reactions and build the right counter strategy if needed.
So let us not be surprised by people who might want our success but let us be prepared and overcome their selfishness and still reach our goals and dreams!
p.s not everyone is out to hurt us.. we have to find those who are friendly and build strong relationships with these people because we might need their support in dealing with those who do hurt us.
-with love-
Friday, June 29, 2012
month of experience hopefully leads to a month of dreams!
The end of another month is here, strange feelings are
attatched as phases come to an end and new begin, each with their own issues
and troubles as well as joy and smiles.
This last month has flown by so fast.
Most likely because Ive been keeping myself busy.
I try to stay active, try to learn new things, try to meet
new people who might help me on my way and I might be able to learn from as
well.
This past month has been full of professional experiences,
personal experiences, love experiences and more.
Its taken me highest of high emotionally, down to the lowest
of low where I become scared and vulnerable.
But all in all, this past month has been amazing.
I reconfirmed my passion and I am sure that I am heading the
right way. Just getting there is taking longer time and has more barriers than
I had expected.
But my approach to this is that ”good things do not come easy”.
It is just, when you know what you want to do when you grow up, but face troubles in getting there, it discourages you. It demotivates you. It allows doubt to enter your thoughts.
But my approach to this is that ”good things do not come easy”.
It is just, when you know what you want to do when you grow up, but face troubles in getting there, it discourages you. It demotivates you. It allows doubt to enter your thoughts.
”I mean, if it is what I am supposed to be doing with my
life, would it be so hard to reach it?”
YES!
So I´ll not keep this longer, but leave you with the thought
that if it hard to reach your dreams, it is mostly because they are worth the
work.
BUT, in some cases the dream is not supposed to be reached.
It is not logical, not realistic to reach it, your work is not bringing you
closer. Then it is important to re-evaluate the dream and either find a new one
or a new way to reach it.
Knowing what you want to do with your life is the biggest
part in the process. We now just have to figure out how to reach it, how to
overcome the barriers and to realize if it is not meant to be, find a new
dream.
It is not so easy, but easier than chasing something that will never happen.
at least you go through moment of pain when dropping the dream and finding another, but your chase will show some efford.
It is not so easy, but easier than chasing something that will never happen.
at least you go through moment of pain when dropping the dream and finding another, but your chase will show some efford.
So at the moment, the barriers to my dreams are not too
high, I still see ways to overcome them. But if, and I hope it doesnt come to
this, but if I realize that I might not reach what I want that way.. I know I
have to re-evaluate my dream, and figure out a new way to reach where I want to
be. Or even.. figuring out something else I could do when I grow up.
So I wish you all a great new month, full of adventures and
dreams. And I wish you success in reaching the place you want to be at in your
life.
-with love-
Friday, June 15, 2012
I take the responsibility for my own life!
I guess life is only as good as you allow it to be.. or what?
Last post I mentioned the Law of attraction and how positive (or negative) thoughts call on good (or bad) events in your life.
So now.. loads of good things have come my way. But in this, like in everything in life, there is a balance between "good and evil". One cannot be without the other.
So Bad news have also arrived.
But I have tried my best to figure out how to solve the problem and still be able to look at life with a smile on my face.
Because I realize that I cannot ask for only good things (well I can but I have to realize that good things come in different "levels" of good) and that things will come my way I do not have any control over, might not be happy with or might mess up my life.
But it is my job, as an individual, as a person in my society, to work through my issues and not blame the "world".
Being a part of society is important to me.. and it should be important to everyone.
But I don't feel like everyone understands how amazing it can be.
My thoughts are, I am no one if I´m not belonging to something, someone, somewhere.
And it is this "something, somewhere" that gives me motivation to work on my issues, to smile to the world and contribute.
I havent given this a lot of thought,
Just wanted to mention this... that it is our role to be a part of our society, to work through our issues to be able to participate and give back and receive what others are giving.
Share our good thoughts, good events, and have support from your network, your society, your people in times of need.
This is just what I believe, like everything else here..this is what floats around in my head!
I hope someone is thinking the same..
if yes, please share.
If no, then please share why! :)
-with love-
Last post I mentioned the Law of attraction and how positive (or negative) thoughts call on good (or bad) events in your life.
So now.. loads of good things have come my way. But in this, like in everything in life, there is a balance between "good and evil". One cannot be without the other.
So Bad news have also arrived.
But I have tried my best to figure out how to solve the problem and still be able to look at life with a smile on my face.
Because I realize that I cannot ask for only good things (well I can but I have to realize that good things come in different "levels" of good) and that things will come my way I do not have any control over, might not be happy with or might mess up my life.
But it is my job, as an individual, as a person in my society, to work through my issues and not blame the "world".
Being a part of society is important to me.. and it should be important to everyone.
But I don't feel like everyone understands how amazing it can be.
My thoughts are, I am no one if I´m not belonging to something, someone, somewhere.
And it is this "something, somewhere" that gives me motivation to work on my issues, to smile to the world and contribute.
I havent given this a lot of thought,
Just wanted to mention this... that it is our role to be a part of our society, to work through our issues to be able to participate and give back and receive what others are giving.
Share our good thoughts, good events, and have support from your network, your society, your people in times of need.
This is just what I believe, like everything else here..this is what floats around in my head!
I hope someone is thinking the same..
if yes, please share.
If no, then please share why! :)
-with love-
Sunday, May 27, 2012
How to work the law of attraction?
Life is interesting.
One day you might be having a rough day, nothing goes your way and you are demotivated. And the next day, things are so much better, you're seeing results, you are positive and passion comes up again.
Law of attraction becomes important to focus on when the streak of good events is taking place in life. Good energy, good thoughts on your behalf bring more good events and good thoughts. That cycle of positive is what life is all about. Negatives are bound to happen in between.. but we cannot allow it to take over our thoughts.
This is what I'm trying to work on.
I know its hard, I experience it every day.
But I wanna enjoy life when things are working out, like it is now in my life.
So by reflecting a little on my thoughts, my attitude, my experience in the week that has passed, I am loving life. I want to make it continue so I'm thinking how can I make sure that actually happens.
Dont get me wrong. Not so pleasant things took place in the week but the positive out weights the negative. and that is what I want to continue focusing on.
But how to do so?
That is what I'm still working on.
I'm still reflecting on my experiences, my thoughts and what I might have done to change the course of my life to the better.
I look at the people around me, how I approach them, how I work with them, how I respect and treat them.
I look at my attitude towards obligatory things in my life, how I partake in them and how I make sure I'm learning something from everything I'm doing,
I'm loving life at the moment.
And I want it to stay.
I want to send out positive energy to receive more positive energy.
And I'm working on it.
-with love-
One day you might be having a rough day, nothing goes your way and you are demotivated. And the next day, things are so much better, you're seeing results, you are positive and passion comes up again.
Law of attraction becomes important to focus on when the streak of good events is taking place in life. Good energy, good thoughts on your behalf bring more good events and good thoughts. That cycle of positive is what life is all about. Negatives are bound to happen in between.. but we cannot allow it to take over our thoughts.
This is what I'm trying to work on.
I know its hard, I experience it every day.
But I wanna enjoy life when things are working out, like it is now in my life.
So by reflecting a little on my thoughts, my attitude, my experience in the week that has passed, I am loving life. I want to make it continue so I'm thinking how can I make sure that actually happens.
Dont get me wrong. Not so pleasant things took place in the week but the positive out weights the negative. and that is what I want to continue focusing on.
But how to do so?
That is what I'm still working on.
I'm still reflecting on my experiences, my thoughts and what I might have done to change the course of my life to the better.
I look at the people around me, how I approach them, how I work with them, how I respect and treat them.
I look at my attitude towards obligatory things in my life, how I partake in them and how I make sure I'm learning something from everything I'm doing,
I'm loving life at the moment.
And I want it to stay.
I want to send out positive energy to receive more positive energy.
And I'm working on it.
-with love-
Saturday, May 19, 2012
The road to relationship - is a journey worth taking
It is interesting, this process of relationship.
I've mentioned it few times how hard it is to follow the "rules" of dating, and how frustrated I am that people think we have to play games to get what we want. It just makes a hard process even harder.
Finding the one you like/love is no easy task.
So having all the barriers and rules, just frightens people of I can imagine.. people just give up on the search, for people who may already be within their sight and just let be, give up, quit. Because that is so much easier than having to go through this winding road.
So the "road" to relationship is hard. That I knew already, both from others as well as my own experience. but I always try to take out the games, the "rules" in order to make it a bit more easier. I wish everyone would think along the same lines as I do.. but that will never happen, another wishful thinking on my behalf. But how can I make sure that I dont fall into playing the games others are playing? How can I not become a "victim" of the relationship game?
I believe, in my case, it is by being extremely outspoken about my intentions, what I want to get out of the particular relationship and being honest. I know, its not as easy as it sounds. far from it.
I know this is what I strive for.. but being honest, being open about your feelings, to a person you like - or even love - can be so frigging scary.
I start to think, what if they dont agree?
What if they dont want the same thing?
What if they think I'm naive for acting this way?
What if, what if?
These what if's are valid.. but the thing is.. if the person you are in a relationship respects you.. s/he will respect that you speak your mind, that you are honest to yourself. even if you might not really play the game they are playing you... I believe respect will be there. And also, if you cannot trust that person to overcome the "rules of the game" and be honest and listen to your concerns, then by all means, get out of that relationship!! That is my opinion.
Everyone plays games... I even play games. I try to choose my "settings of the game, the situation", carefully. try to make sure my game does not rule the way I build relationship with people.
Because those games, I find can break down a relationship just as fast as it can build one!! And that I dont want..if I'm anyway interested in building a relationship with someone. then I want it to be built on a solid ground.. with respect.
Just another thought I needed to get out there.. because all my questions just circle in my head and are one step closer to have answers when I "speak" them out loud here.
-with love-
So the "road" to relationship is hard. That I knew already, both from others as well as my own experience. but I always try to take out the games, the "rules" in order to make it a bit more easier. I wish everyone would think along the same lines as I do.. but that will never happen, another wishful thinking on my behalf. But how can I make sure that I dont fall into playing the games others are playing? How can I not become a "victim" of the relationship game?
I believe, in my case, it is by being extremely outspoken about my intentions, what I want to get out of the particular relationship and being honest. I know, its not as easy as it sounds. far from it.
I know this is what I strive for.. but being honest, being open about your feelings, to a person you like - or even love - can be so frigging scary.
I start to think, what if they dont agree?
What if they dont want the same thing?
What if they think I'm naive for acting this way?
What if, what if?
These what if's are valid.. but the thing is.. if the person you are in a relationship respects you.. s/he will respect that you speak your mind, that you are honest to yourself. even if you might not really play the game they are playing you... I believe respect will be there. And also, if you cannot trust that person to overcome the "rules of the game" and be honest and listen to your concerns, then by all means, get out of that relationship!! That is my opinion.
Everyone plays games... I even play games. I try to choose my "settings of the game, the situation", carefully. try to make sure my game does not rule the way I build relationship with people.
Because those games, I find can break down a relationship just as fast as it can build one!! And that I dont want..if I'm anyway interested in building a relationship with someone. then I want it to be built on a solid ground.. with respect.
Just another thought I needed to get out there.. because all my questions just circle in my head and are one step closer to have answers when I "speak" them out loud here.
-with love-
Thursday, March 29, 2012
You are my special someone - let me be yours!
It is amazing how good people can make you feel and how special they can make you believe you are.
Everyone of us has the need to be cared for, need to feel loved, need to feel comfortable in our own skins, need to have smiles and intimite kisses once and a while.
Finding the people who make this happen for you is a blessing.
Do not take it for granted you will meet one easily.
Being a shy person, not so comfortable about myself in one way but super secure about my abilities in other areas, is a challenge.
Being totally comfortable with someone, allowing my guard to fall back a little, laughing, smiling, feeling ok by crying in front of that someone, is a rare feeling for me.
So when I've found it, I'll try my hardest to fight for it.
because that is what it takes.... fight!
Show appreciation, show that person the same respect, same love, same vulnerability to allow them to cry or laugh,
that is what makes life worth living, it makes the hard times worth it.
Because you have someone to share them with, someone who makes you feel better about you and your situations.
Who doesnt want that?
but do we all recognize it and fight for it when we have it?
I doubt it.
And that is what I fear, not fighting hard enough, not fighting fair enough and showing how much this person means to me!
By writing this, I wish you all to be open to this person. this one who makes you smile and be secure about who you are, no matter how you look like.
I wish you all to hold on to this person, because they dont come often..
I wish you to fight for them. Because if you dont, they'll leave.
Just as much as you need to feel the love, feel the security, feel the passion.. that person has the same needs as well.
Do them right just as they are doing you right.
That is my wish, for the coming days, months and even years..
-with love-
Everyone of us has the need to be cared for, need to feel loved, need to feel comfortable in our own skins, need to have smiles and intimite kisses once and a while.
Finding the people who make this happen for you is a blessing.
Do not take it for granted you will meet one easily.
Being a shy person, not so comfortable about myself in one way but super secure about my abilities in other areas, is a challenge.
Being totally comfortable with someone, allowing my guard to fall back a little, laughing, smiling, feeling ok by crying in front of that someone, is a rare feeling for me.
So when I've found it, I'll try my hardest to fight for it.
because that is what it takes.... fight!
Show appreciation, show that person the same respect, same love, same vulnerability to allow them to cry or laugh,
that is what makes life worth living, it makes the hard times worth it.
Because you have someone to share them with, someone who makes you feel better about you and your situations.
Who doesnt want that?
but do we all recognize it and fight for it when we have it?
I doubt it.
And that is what I fear, not fighting hard enough, not fighting fair enough and showing how much this person means to me!
By writing this, I wish you all to be open to this person. this one who makes you smile and be secure about who you are, no matter how you look like.
I wish you all to hold on to this person, because they dont come often..
I wish you to fight for them. Because if you dont, they'll leave.
Just as much as you need to feel the love, feel the security, feel the passion.. that person has the same needs as well.
Do them right just as they are doing you right.
That is my wish, for the coming days, months and even years..
-with love-
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Music makes the world go round - and all my feelings as well !!
Few times here I've written about the power of lyrics and music, how certain songs and their words can heal/refocus your thoughts, your feelings and your heart.
I have my own personal healing song, a song I listen to when I know I need to move on.. when I know I cannot stay in the mindset I'm in at that time.
And it works ALL THE TIME.
maybe that is because I know it is my healing song and when I listen to it in that purpose it just works.
but its not that often that the singer impacts me more than the lyrics.
However, I just had that experience tonight.
I was listening to a song I dont know sung by a person I have only heard few times sing and I could feel my happiness and love just flowing. It made me think about people I care about, it made me think of not being angry when there is no need - and the funny thing is that I dont know if the lyrics of the song were in any alignment with this or not.. I just heard this guy's voice and I got blown away.
I just wanted to share this with anyone who is reading.
Be open for empowerment, for inspiration, for guidance
Because it can come in any form, at any time when you least expect it.
And when it does come and you notice that it impacts you - listen to those feelings, listen to your motivations, listen to what this is telling you.. and follow it.
I know that I feel even happier now than I was before this song... my anger melted away and I'm so happy for that, because it was useless anger - but I couldnt see it until now - when certain emotions were woken in me.
And I appreciate it.
I hope you do too!!
-with love-
I have my own personal healing song, a song I listen to when I know I need to move on.. when I know I cannot stay in the mindset I'm in at that time.
And it works ALL THE TIME.
maybe that is because I know it is my healing song and when I listen to it in that purpose it just works.
but its not that often that the singer impacts me more than the lyrics.
However, I just had that experience tonight.
I was listening to a song I dont know sung by a person I have only heard few times sing and I could feel my happiness and love just flowing. It made me think about people I care about, it made me think of not being angry when there is no need - and the funny thing is that I dont know if the lyrics of the song were in any alignment with this or not.. I just heard this guy's voice and I got blown away.
I just wanted to share this with anyone who is reading.
Be open for empowerment, for inspiration, for guidance
Because it can come in any form, at any time when you least expect it.
And when it does come and you notice that it impacts you - listen to those feelings, listen to your motivations, listen to what this is telling you.. and follow it.
I know that I feel even happier now than I was before this song... my anger melted away and I'm so happy for that, because it was useless anger - but I couldnt see it until now - when certain emotions were woken in me.
And I appreciate it.
I hope you do too!!
-with love-
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Balance in emotions lead to balance in work/life situations?
Today should be the last day of February but lucky me, there is one extra day this year. I had planned to be more active in writing here, to make sure I share my thoughts and hopefully learn more from sharing them and potentially gain some insight from others.
February has not been so kind to me in this sense.. or in any other aspect. When I look back on February I feel ashamed of myself and the lack of motivation and energy I‘ve been demonstrating. Even though I‘m feeling physically better... there has been something on my soul, or what I can say, that makes me waste my days in horrible ways with no productivity at all.
That is just not me.
But maybe this one month of de-motivation was what I needed? I hope so.. Because when I feel ashamed of myself I expect to perform better and be more organized and reach my potentials. I can NOT have one more month of doing absolutely nothing.
But anyways, my lack of motivation was not going to be my main subject for this post. But rather state of mind – which motivation belongs to – and what affects this state of mind and how it affects your daily life.
There have been many things happening this month.. sad, hurtful, joyful moments have come and gone. I‘ve been happy one minute and then cried the next. I‘ve rekindled friendship, I‘ve experienced a crush, I‘ve had an argument and I‘ve felt hurt by people I care about. when I look back on February I‘m glad about my personal life but sad about my professional life.
So my main question for this post is „how to make a balance between personal and professional feelings and motivation?“
I read somewhere that if you are happy at home you take that attitude and state of mind to your work. And vice versa. And usually that has been my case.
But my state of mind this month has been so up and down, so back and forth, so unclear and so focused that I cannot seem to find any balance. Or at least not in the beginning of the month. Now, as I reflect on my actions this month and my awareness of my mindset, my willingness to alter that mindset have started to sink in.. and I‘m feeling smile come over more as well as I feel little things are creating energy within me. Something that my mindset earlier this month would not allow.
But what happened?
My personal belief is that when your feelings are so messed up you find it hard to direct any motivation from them in the areas where the motivation and energy is needed. So despite the fact that generally I feel happy personally, the mix of emotions that led to that happiness created a hinder for my motivation on my professional site. Without knowing it I blamed boredom and unappealing projects for the lack of motivation, when deep down it was me that was failing myself.
Why the positive change?
I started thinking more, being critical about my behaviour and that led to this shame I feel, this understanding that this messiness is not me. I start to appreciate the small things again. The sun, the birds, the art I see, the different environments I encounter and the people who really treat me nice. I was too focused on one thing and one thing only. And balance does not come from that. My state of mind was challenged and I have started to let go.. and make sure others are let in. My mindset has altered and I feel the smile come back.
So my last thoughts as I allow February to pass with its heart ache, its tears, its smiles and its love, is that I have to be careful of what creates my balance, and what mindset I have to be in to allow this to happen.
I have to be open-minded as the small things, the unexpected things, the surroundings, are the main contribution to my happiness and energy. So with the right mindset and happy feelings, I feel much more ready to enter March and tackle it with more productivity than I have shown in the passing month.
I hope this post made any sense to you – as I write it, I start making more sense of it myself.
-with love-
February has not been so kind to me in this sense.. or in any other aspect. When I look back on February I feel ashamed of myself and the lack of motivation and energy I‘ve been demonstrating. Even though I‘m feeling physically better... there has been something on my soul, or what I can say, that makes me waste my days in horrible ways with no productivity at all.
That is just not me.
But maybe this one month of de-motivation was what I needed? I hope so.. Because when I feel ashamed of myself I expect to perform better and be more organized and reach my potentials. I can NOT have one more month of doing absolutely nothing.
But anyways, my lack of motivation was not going to be my main subject for this post. But rather state of mind – which motivation belongs to – and what affects this state of mind and how it affects your daily life.
There have been many things happening this month.. sad, hurtful, joyful moments have come and gone. I‘ve been happy one minute and then cried the next. I‘ve rekindled friendship, I‘ve experienced a crush, I‘ve had an argument and I‘ve felt hurt by people I care about. when I look back on February I‘m glad about my personal life but sad about my professional life.
So my main question for this post is „how to make a balance between personal and professional feelings and motivation?“
I read somewhere that if you are happy at home you take that attitude and state of mind to your work. And vice versa. And usually that has been my case.
But my state of mind this month has been so up and down, so back and forth, so unclear and so focused that I cannot seem to find any balance. Or at least not in the beginning of the month. Now, as I reflect on my actions this month and my awareness of my mindset, my willingness to alter that mindset have started to sink in.. and I‘m feeling smile come over more as well as I feel little things are creating energy within me. Something that my mindset earlier this month would not allow.
But what happened?
My personal belief is that when your feelings are so messed up you find it hard to direct any motivation from them in the areas where the motivation and energy is needed. So despite the fact that generally I feel happy personally, the mix of emotions that led to that happiness created a hinder for my motivation on my professional site. Without knowing it I blamed boredom and unappealing projects for the lack of motivation, when deep down it was me that was failing myself.
Why the positive change?
I started thinking more, being critical about my behaviour and that led to this shame I feel, this understanding that this messiness is not me. I start to appreciate the small things again. The sun, the birds, the art I see, the different environments I encounter and the people who really treat me nice. I was too focused on one thing and one thing only. And balance does not come from that. My state of mind was challenged and I have started to let go.. and make sure others are let in. My mindset has altered and I feel the smile come back.
So my last thoughts as I allow February to pass with its heart ache, its tears, its smiles and its love, is that I have to be careful of what creates my balance, and what mindset I have to be in to allow this to happen.
I have to be open-minded as the small things, the unexpected things, the surroundings, are the main contribution to my happiness and energy. So with the right mindset and happy feelings, I feel much more ready to enter March and tackle it with more productivity than I have shown in the passing month.
I hope this post made any sense to you – as I write it, I start making more sense of it myself.
-with love-
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Luck of the dragon - is this your year?
Its the end of the month, the first month of this new year - the year of the dragon!
the year of the dragon is supposed to be a lucky year, according to what I hear. Why that is, I'm not sure. But I like it.
So far, this year has been awesome. is it because of the dragon spirit, I'm not sure either. But it is good none the less.
I believe luck is what you make of it. and with the attitude that this year will be great, it will be your lucky year.. then the chances of that coming true increase enormously.
I want to believe that at least.
So why do I want to believe this?
Well, I believe that if we believe something, we think about it regularly the more likely we are to act accordingly and take decisions that lead us to that direction. Maybe even without knowing that we are doing so.
By believing we are taking a bit more control over our lives, and what happens in them.
By believing, in whatever it is - luck of a dragon year or whatever - the mind starts to visualize where it wants to go, what it is that he believes in and how to get there.
For the people who feel like their lives are not going where they want it to be, I question if they actually know where they want it to be, do they believe that they can get there and do they believe that they are worth getting there?
Because if not, in my opinion, the mind has not visualize it enough to take decisions guided by that vision.
Life is hard.
We all know that from time to time.
But if we believe in something, we really want it, then life can get just a little bit better as we work our way towards it.
Or at least that is my opinion.
Just wanted to share this, just a small thought that needs even more reflection and discussion :)
- with love -
the year of the dragon is supposed to be a lucky year, according to what I hear. Why that is, I'm not sure. But I like it.
So far, this year has been awesome. is it because of the dragon spirit, I'm not sure either. But it is good none the less.
I believe luck is what you make of it. and with the attitude that this year will be great, it will be your lucky year.. then the chances of that coming true increase enormously.
I want to believe that at least.
So why do I want to believe this?
Well, I believe that if we believe something, we think about it regularly the more likely we are to act accordingly and take decisions that lead us to that direction. Maybe even without knowing that we are doing so.
By believing we are taking a bit more control over our lives, and what happens in them.
By believing, in whatever it is - luck of a dragon year or whatever - the mind starts to visualize where it wants to go, what it is that he believes in and how to get there.
For the people who feel like their lives are not going where they want it to be, I question if they actually know where they want it to be, do they believe that they can get there and do they believe that they are worth getting there?
Because if not, in my opinion, the mind has not visualize it enough to take decisions guided by that vision.
Life is hard.
We all know that from time to time.
But if we believe in something, we really want it, then life can get just a little bit better as we work our way towards it.
Or at least that is my opinion.
Just wanted to share this, just a small thought that needs even more reflection and discussion :)
- with love -
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Value driven actions - I am worth it :)
Life takes unexpected turns, in a spur of a moment the path you are on might not feel right, might offer many twists and turns and uncertainty ahead.
But these changes dont happen by themselves. As people we stand in front of choices, we take decisions, we walk the directions we believe to give us something.
I've talked about the idea of fighting for the people who you want to have in your life. I realized when I wrote it, that it might be a wishful thinking.. being so couragous to contact, to reach out, to open up to strangers, even if they leave a mark on you which you cant explain.
But if you do take the chance, it just might bring your life to unexpected turns, for the better.
I've always believed I'm capable of anything. And I am.
But if I think something is wishful thinking, not really gonna happen but a nice idea, then I'm never gonna be able to do this, get what I want, to be with the person I want to be.
I'm then gonna settle on something that I might see more "reachable".
Isnt that sad?
few posts ago I wrote about a quote I saw in a book I was reading, "what is your life worth, is it worth the life you are living".
And its a strange sentence but it makes so much sense.
How much to I value my life?
Do my actions and ideas reflect that value?
If I have wishful thinking but dont think I can reach it, am I then not undervalue my life?
My life today is great, because people were not afraid to reach out, to open up, to stop believing in wishful thinking and start believing in what they are worth. And the good thing that came out of this is what they believe fits the value of their lives.
It might not make any sense to you..
but this makes so much sense to me.
As I sit here and write this, I'm realizing more how I need to start valuing my life and thinking that my actions should reflect on how much I do value it, and that I'm worth it.
I hope you do too.
-with love-
But these changes dont happen by themselves. As people we stand in front of choices, we take decisions, we walk the directions we believe to give us something.
I've talked about the idea of fighting for the people who you want to have in your life. I realized when I wrote it, that it might be a wishful thinking.. being so couragous to contact, to reach out, to open up to strangers, even if they leave a mark on you which you cant explain.
But if you do take the chance, it just might bring your life to unexpected turns, for the better.
I've always believed I'm capable of anything. And I am.
But if I think something is wishful thinking, not really gonna happen but a nice idea, then I'm never gonna be able to do this, get what I want, to be with the person I want to be.
I'm then gonna settle on something that I might see more "reachable".
Isnt that sad?
few posts ago I wrote about a quote I saw in a book I was reading, "what is your life worth, is it worth the life you are living".
And its a strange sentence but it makes so much sense.
How much to I value my life?
Do my actions and ideas reflect that value?
If I have wishful thinking but dont think I can reach it, am I then not undervalue my life?
My life today is great, because people were not afraid to reach out, to open up, to stop believing in wishful thinking and start believing in what they are worth. And the good thing that came out of this is what they believe fits the value of their lives.
It might not make any sense to you..
but this makes so much sense to me.
As I sit here and write this, I'm realizing more how I need to start valuing my life and thinking that my actions should reflect on how much I do value it, and that I'm worth it.
I hope you do too.
-with love-
Thursday, January 12, 2012
evaluation brings me closer to the person I am supposed to become!
The first post of the year and I was thinking about what to share here.
And after a little brainstorm by myself I decided that maybe the most appropriate topic would be evaluating the year that just passed.
Why evaluating?
Well, in my optinion, if you want to get anywhere in life, no matter where, you have to appreciate your good moments and learn from the bed moments. and evaluating how the year was, the highlights and low points might bring more light to what makes a good year for each and everyone of us.. because it is so individualized.
this was my thought at least.
I'll not go in too much details about my year, that is also not needed unless you want to indentify in each month what made your month and contributed to the learning of the year.
My point of departure begins with a feeling.
How do I feel about the year 2011?
My overall feeling is possitive. I managed to close one chapter of my life and preparing for the next chapter. I feel like 2011 had a big influence in making me the person who I am today and realizing where my passion really is and what I can do with that.
So overall, I'm happy with my experiences throughout the year 2011.
Going into more details of what I mean.
Writing a thesis, doing the organizing, the research, the presentation, it all made me realize that I'm passionate about learning, about creating knowledge and delivering it to those interested.
I already knew this was an interest. but the process during the year made me realize that this is what I want to do with my life.
Another thing I feel i learnt this year is the need to work in all relationships. You always hear "marriage is a house who's foundation needs to be built every day". I think that saying does not only relate to marriages but in all types of relationships. if you do not work on your friendships they dissapear.
That was one of my biggest learnings, from the sad moments this year.
and finally, the events I went through, the loss I experienced this year, made me realize who strong my ties are to my family and how much strength I gain from the relationships.
I always know how much the family meant for me.. but I learnt this year that I actually becomes stronger the better my relationship is with them. And I beliece they become stronger with a stronger relationship as well.
So overall, despite many heartbreaking moments, sadness and crying I feel the laughter, the smiles and the hard work towards success is what made me who I am today. And thinking about 2011 really made me realize it fully.
Having it clear makes you stronger, makes you able to learn, to give something back.. because you know where you stand.
I hope this works for you as well as it worked for me.
-with love-
And after a little brainstorm by myself I decided that maybe the most appropriate topic would be evaluating the year that just passed.
Why evaluating?
Well, in my optinion, if you want to get anywhere in life, no matter where, you have to appreciate your good moments and learn from the bed moments. and evaluating how the year was, the highlights and low points might bring more light to what makes a good year for each and everyone of us.. because it is so individualized.
this was my thought at least.
I'll not go in too much details about my year, that is also not needed unless you want to indentify in each month what made your month and contributed to the learning of the year.
My point of departure begins with a feeling.
How do I feel about the year 2011?
My overall feeling is possitive. I managed to close one chapter of my life and preparing for the next chapter. I feel like 2011 had a big influence in making me the person who I am today and realizing where my passion really is and what I can do with that.
So overall, I'm happy with my experiences throughout the year 2011.
Going into more details of what I mean.
Writing a thesis, doing the organizing, the research, the presentation, it all made me realize that I'm passionate about learning, about creating knowledge and delivering it to those interested.
I already knew this was an interest. but the process during the year made me realize that this is what I want to do with my life.
Another thing I feel i learnt this year is the need to work in all relationships. You always hear "marriage is a house who's foundation needs to be built every day". I think that saying does not only relate to marriages but in all types of relationships. if you do not work on your friendships they dissapear.
That was one of my biggest learnings, from the sad moments this year.
and finally, the events I went through, the loss I experienced this year, made me realize who strong my ties are to my family and how much strength I gain from the relationships.
I always know how much the family meant for me.. but I learnt this year that I actually becomes stronger the better my relationship is with them. And I beliece they become stronger with a stronger relationship as well.
So overall, despite many heartbreaking moments, sadness and crying I feel the laughter, the smiles and the hard work towards success is what made me who I am today. And thinking about 2011 really made me realize it fully.
Having it clear makes you stronger, makes you able to learn, to give something back.. because you know where you stand.
I hope this works for you as well as it worked for me.
-with love-
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